August 2023 INSIGHTS

This oppressive entity, metaphorically akin to a destructive monster, is ceaselessly sustained by society at large. 

First a little background. 

One of the most common tactics used by abusers is to isolate their victims from others. This can be done in several ways, such as controlling who the victim can see or talk to, restricting their access to communication devices, or castigating them to other adults and accuse them of abhorrent behavior to create a prerequisite of expectation to justify abuse, masked as corporal punishment.

Isolation makes it easier for abusers to control their victims and to keep them from getting help. When a victim is isolated, they are more likely to believe the abuser’s lies and manipulations. They are also less likely to report the abuse, because they don’t have anyone to confide in or to help them escape.

In some cases, abusers will use isolation to leverage systematic abuse. This means that they will use the victim’s physical or mental isolation to their advantage in order to control them and to exploit them. For example, an abuser might isolate a victim physically, where they can be more easily controlled and monitored. The effects of isolation can be devastating for victims. Isolation takes on many forms in addition to physical methods. Children subjected to such conditions can experience feelings of desolation, trepidation, and despair that haunt them well into adulthood. They may also develop low self-esteem and difficulty trusting others. In some cases, isolation can lead to serious mental health problems, such as depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

It is crucial to remember that these allegations, while serious and deeply concerning, are specific to certain group homes and are not representative of all religion-based group homes. Many of these homes continue to operate within the confines of the law, providing safe and supportive environments for children in need. Therefore, it is essential to approach the issue with a nuanced understanding, ensuring justice for the victims while avoiding blanket stigmatization of all Christian group homes.

Children in group homes often come with a “broken” stigma attached to them as well as variety of complex psychological issues, having experienced trauma, neglect, or abuse. These children’s behavior, albeit sometimes challenging, is often a manifestation of these experiences. When counselors shift blame onto these children, it not only absolves them of their role in guiding positive behavioral changes, but it also reinforces a sense of self-blame and guilt in the child.

Be a light in a Child’s life and report abuse to the correct authorities.

If you are concerned that someone you know is being isolated by an abuser, there are a few things you can do to help. You can offer your support and friendship, and you can encourage the victim to reach out for help from a trusted adult or professional. You can also report the abuse to the authorities. It is important to remember that you are not alone. There are people who care about you and who want to help. If you are being abused, please reach out for help. There is no shame in asking for help, and it is the first step on the road to recovery.

Michael The Archangel Protecting the children
©2024 by Xerial All Rights Reserved

Blame Shifting From Adults To Children, Particularly In These Settings, Can Be Understood From Various Psychological And Sociological Perspectives.

  • Defense mechanism: From a psychological point of view, blame shifting can often be seen as a defense mechanism. Adults, especially those working under stressful conditions, may unconsciously project their own feelings of frustration or inadequacy onto the children for whom they are caring. This projection, when combined with an inappropriate attribution of responsibility to the child, can result in a blame-shifting dynamic.
  • Power dynamics: Blame shifting is also a reflection of power dynamics. Adults typically have more authority in a child’s life, and this power can be misused to shift responsibility for negative situations onto children, who are less able to defend themselves. This can lead to a cycle of blame and guilt that reinforces negative behavioral patterns.
  • Avoidance of accountability: Shifting blame onto children may also be a way for adults to avoid taking responsibility for their own actions or failings. This might be particularly pronounced in situations where adults are dealing with high levels of stress and inadequate resources, and they might find it easier to blame children rather than addressing the more systemic issues at play.
  • Societal attitudes: Societal attitudes towards children and their behavior can also contribute to blame shifting. If society tends to view certain behaviors as inherent to the child rather than a response to their environment or experiences, it becomes easier for adults to attribute blame to the child.

This blame shifting can have significant effects on children. It can lead to feelings of guilt and shame, damage their self-esteem, and disrupt their development of healthy coping mechanisms. Moreover, it may discourage children from seeking help when they are being mistreated, as they may fear being blamed or not being believed.

 Here are  resources that you may find helpful:


Children often look for outlets using whatever resources are within their reach. In Michael’s case, he bought a joke book. He enjoyed making people laugh and loved the attention that it brought him.

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